im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
