Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize