just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize