There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
