Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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