So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
