Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
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Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
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AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going