We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
