need another drink. this is the easiest way
I got chris browned last night
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
