i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Randomize
