can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
