Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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