Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
