dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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