D3 body, D1 cock
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
