these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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