im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Randomize