if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
