It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize