SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
