I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize