Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
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thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
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My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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