so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
