Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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