home. puking in laundry basket.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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