i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize