Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
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