Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Randomize
