You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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