She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
so let's talk penis.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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