is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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