It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
