i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
