Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
