you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
