how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize