Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
