I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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