Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
