Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
