Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
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