Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(713): View more from Texas

Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!

(832): View more from Houston, Texas

you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever

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(301): View more from Maryland

I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?

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(731): View more from Tennessee

What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(760): View more from California

She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.

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(818): View more from California

he made a bald eagle out of coke lines

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.

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(623): View more from Arizona

It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.

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(585): View more from New York

I just need some of your time and all of your body.

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