Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
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