Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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