remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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