Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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