You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
we should paint friendship bongs
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