My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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