Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
