Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize