The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Randomize