Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
